Mel's Shopping Diary
Top Funny Poems
July 23, 2008A lot of the poems we received were very funny and clever, and I really want to thank you all for making me laugh and bringing me hours of entertainment. It was really, really hard to choose. I chose these poems because they really captured my sense of humor.
The last line of this poem always makes me cackle!
School of the Beautiful
“OH EM GEE,
look at me.”
It’s Mimi!
Holy cow,
She looks just...wow!
Sky’s gone from goth to KAPOW!
“No really ya’ll,
it’s just a little modeling call!”
Oh Bliss is such a doll!
Oh dear God,
look at his bod.
Ooh Jack, give me the nod!
Silly Red Bloods,
good looks are for immortals!
-Jen C.
Limericks are fab, and I thought this one was fun:
Jack, A Limerick
There once was a hot vampire named Jack,
With a jealous sister who always had his back.
Until he fell in love with another girl
Which made Mimi hurl.
The poor, hot, handsome vampire named Jack.
-Jaclyn G.
The first and last lines of this poem always makes me laugh. Since it came in untitled I have a suggested title: Jack’s Dilemma.
Jack’s Dilemma
Let’s face it, that whole “your mom’s so hot” joke is overplayed
But Gabrielle is my soul’s light in ways that cannot fade.
Yet her daughter Schuyler has a hold that could lead me far astray
If only I weren’t so freaked by what my twin Mimi would say.
I know I’m hurting my destined mate as I close her from my mind
But I’m protecting her from images of Schuyler she would find.
Do I embrace Death and Destruction though my fate may (literally) bite?
Or turn my back to all I know and go into the Light?
Two amazing girls to choose from but I don’t know who.
I know I sound a spoiled brat but what’s a guy to do?
-Kasi H.
I particularly loved all the poems about Mimi’s vanity and bitchiness. They were hilarious! I think I liked this one the most because of the last line. It just says it all…
You All Wish You Were Me-Me
Queen of New York, she has it all
Had the hottest date for the 400 Ball.
Rules the place known as Duchesne School,
She can make even Schuyler’s rags look cool.
Can get any guy she wants, though she only wants one
Still she leads them on, just for fun.
If someone were to claim her other half,
They’d suffer the impending doom of her wrath.
Schuyler’s had her eyes on Jack and now she’s moving in--
Though she might try, she’ll never win.
Her closet boasts labels from Gucci to Chanel,
Get on her wrong side and she’ll make your life a living hell.
Wherever she goes is the place to be,
I’d be jealous of her, except she’s ME!
-Theresoniyus
You guys really are the best!!! More poems to come....including the grand prize winnahs!
xoxo
Mel
On July 23, 2008 at 4:59 pm, casey had this to say:
YAY! I’m on there. Thanks Mel! <3
On July 23, 2008 at 5:04 pm, Kali .o. had this to say:
Love them! What happens if my poems not posted but it said i was a winner?
On July 23, 2008 at 5:11 pm, Sylvana had this to say:
hahahahahahaha those are great. xD “your mom’s so hot”
On July 23, 2008 at 5:11 pm, stephanie had this to say:
AHAH! I absolutely LOVE the last poem!!!! the last line is really funny!
On July 23, 2008 at 5:35 pm, Hannah W. had this to say:
lol!!!!!!
On July 23, 2008 at 6:10 pm, sandra had this to say:
OMG!!!!!!! These are so AAAAAAAMMMMMMAAzing WOW!!!!!! :0 great job guys
On July 23, 2008 at 6:12 pm, laura had this to say:
to Kali O.
i was wondering the same but i think i figured it out.
the ones she listed were the semi-finalists and she will not post the actual poems.
the poems mel is posting are the finalists and the grand prize winners
On July 23, 2008 at 6:18 pm, Deaven E. had this to say:
hee hee, these were amazing! i good never do anything like that awesome work!
On July 23, 2008 at 6:48 pm, Melissa B. had this to say:
My poem was picked but i haven’t gotten any kind of email, should i have a reason to worry???
ONCE AGAIN THESE POEMS ARE HILARIOUS AND TOTALLY GREAT!!
=)
On July 23, 2008 at 8:07 pm, Natalie had this to say:
My poem was picked but i haven’t gotten any kind of email, should i have a reason to worry???
ONCE AGAIN THESE POEMS ARE HILARIOUS AND TOTALLY GREAT!!
=)
^^^ i havent gotten one either, so i dont think you have to worry about it. she is probably waiting to announce ALL the winners before she sends them out. that way it will be a surprise.
side note, those poems were very clever! you all did a great job, congrats, guys.
On July 23, 2008 at 8:49 pm, stheno had this to say:
9 spots left!
On July 23, 2008 at 8:57 pm, Alyssa had this to say:
All of these made me laugh! I really loved Kasi’s about Jack and the last line was the best!
Great job to all!
On July 23, 2008 at 9:41 pm, Melissa B. had this to say:
that makes me feel a whole lot better.....
THANX!
On July 23, 2008 at 10:42 pm, Kei had this to say:
Hahahahahaha!! i really wonder how people come up with these poems.
On July 24, 2008 at 12:25 am, Torie had this to say:
Who wrote “You all Wish You Were Me-ME”? it was amazing!!! i am still cracking up. very very clever. who ever wrote it has major poetry skills.
On July 24, 2008 at 6:48 am, Allison Jones had this to say:
i love the poems!!! i really like you all wish you were me-me it was great!!
On July 24, 2008 at 9:01 am, stheno had this to say:
omg, today is the last day!! today is when we find out who the last winners aree!! : D
On July 24, 2008 at 10:30 am, Briana had this to say:
i’m so excited to see the last batch of winners today!
On July 24, 2008 at 1:11 pm, nikki had this to say:
i loved the first three poems! they were sooooo cute! :D 
<3
On July 25, 2008 at 2:08 pm, robyn had this to say:
These are hilarious!!!!!! I love them!!!!
On July 23, 2008 at 4:47 pm, Melissa B. had this to say:
Yesssssssssssssssssssss first!!!!
These poems are the bomb.com!!!!!!!