Turn down the volume?

Okay, so the prizes are OFF MY COUCH! Now they are on my sister’s couch. (She is my assistant.) BUT, they are now all in thick brown envelopes READY FOR SHIPPING! So hopefully sis will get her butt to the post office this week and mail all your wonderful prizes.

How great is it to have my sister be my assistant? It’s wonderful! And yes, I pay her. It’s a paying gig. (You think she’d work for free?? You don’t know my sister!) I tell everyone I have the smartest assistant in the world–after all, sis went to Yale and got an MBA and an MPH from Columbia. So why is she working for me, you ask? Well, she quit her job to raise her two boys (my darling nephews) and was looking for something to do that was no-stress but still fun. And I told her I was looking for someone to help around here, so she volunteered and she was hired on the spot!

My sister and I fought A LOT when we were kids. I’m 22 months older and deeeeply resented the arrival of the new baby. (I realize "deeply resented" is my favorite phrase right now. Can you tell I’m cranky lately?) But now we are total BFFs. The only reason why I would have another child is that I can’t imagine Mattie not having the kind of relationship my sis, my brother and I share. We are all BFFs.

Anyway, I have been reading the September issues of the fashion mags. And horror of horrors – volume is out! So the small fortune we spent on all those trapeze, a-line, bubble, empire-waist dresses…WASTED!! I counted and I have NINE of these dresses. I’m so annoyed! And I’m really annoyed with myself because whenever the new trend comes around–I totally EMBRACE it. I also owned like, seven ponchos when those were in style. Remember ponchos??? So I can’t believe I fell for it again. Grumble, grumble.

I always shop thinking YES, THIS IS ME! And for a season, it is. I also have DOZENS of those Indian-style tunics and printed Marni shirts. I really thought that was my look and that was it forever. But now I want to put them all in storage. They are sadly not me anymore.

Now all I’m feeling is basics…I only want to wear crisp white shirts and expensive black cashmere and lots of grays and army greens. And lots of streamlined pants and tailored blazers. I think that’s going to be my uniform for awhile.

The last time I wore a uniform it was white Agnes B. shirts, slim-slim-slim Joseph or Daryl K pants and lots of Helmut Lang sweaters (remember those? With the cut-out elbows??) I think that was around 1998 or so. And now it’s back! And my new wardrobe is now out of style. Argh!

Fashion is a cruel. cruel muse and hell on the pocketbook.