Top Funny Poems

A lot of the poems we received were very funny and clever, and I really want to thank you all for making me laugh and bringing me hours of entertainment. It was really, really hard to choose. I chose these poems because they really captured my sense of humor.

The last line of this poem always makes me cackle!

School of the Beautiful

“OH EM GEE,
look at me.”
It’s Mimi!

Holy cow,
She looks just…wow!
Sky’s gone from goth to KAPOW!

“No really ya’ll,
it’s just a little modeling call!”
Oh Bliss is such a doll!

Oh dear God,
look at his bod.
Ooh Jack, give me the nod!

Silly Red Bloods,
good looks are for immortals!

-Jen C.

Limericks are fab, and I thought this one was fun:

Jack, A Limerick

There once was a hot vampire named Jack,
With a jealous sister who always had his back.
Until he fell in love with another girl
Which made Mimi hurl.
The poor, hot, handsome vampire named Jack.

-Jaclyn G.

The first and last lines of this poem always makes me laugh. Since it came in untitled I have a suggested title: Jack’s Dilemma.

Jack’s Dilemma

Let’s face it, that whole “your mom’s so hot” joke is overplayed
But Gabrielle is my soul’s light in ways that cannot fade.

Yet her daughter Schuyler has a hold that could lead me far astray
If only I weren’t so freaked by what my twin Mimi would say.

I know I’m hurting my destined mate as I close her from my mind
But I’m protecting her from images of Schuyler she would find.

Do I embrace Death and Destruction though my fate may (literally) bite?
Or turn my back to all I know and go into the Light?

Two amazing girls to choose from but I don’t know who.
I know I sound a spoiled brat but what’s a guy to do?

-Kasi H.

I particularly loved all the poems about Mimi’s vanity and bitchiness. They were hilarious! I think I liked this one the most because of the last line. It just says it all…

You All Wish You Were Me-Me

Queen of New York, she has it all
Had the hottest date for the 400 Ball.

Rules the place known as Duchesne School,
She can make even Schuyler’s rags look cool.

Can get any guy she wants, though she only wants one
Still she leads them on, just for fun.

If someone were to claim her other half,
They’d suffer the impending doom of her wrath.

Schuyler’s had her eyes on Jack and now she’s moving in—
Though she might try, she’ll never win.

Her closet boasts labels from Gucci to Chanel,
Get on her wrong side and she’ll make your life a living hell.

Wherever she goes is the place to be,
I’d be jealous of her, except she’s ME!

-Theresoniyus

You guys really are the best!!! More poems to come….including the grand prize winnahs!
xoxo
Mel