Is There Ever Such A Thing as Detachment Parenting?

There has been no blogging in a while because there has been major shuffling the baby to her activities! My goodness, she’s only eleven months old, and already she is as over-scheduled as a high-schooler trying to get into Harvard. (Or as the case is in L.A., as a fifth-grader trying to get into Harvard-Westlake!) Me, I’m pooped!

The funny thing about all these classes is that the babies kind of do what the babies do–they just wander around, crawling or walking aimlessly, picking up lint from the floor and occasionally looking up to see what the crazy grown-ups are doing. I suspect all these music and gym and yoga classes are really for the moms! Because I have worked up a sweat doing them! Foof!

I am trying not to let my natural competitive streak manifest itself in my relationship with my child. Her classes are the first time we’ve been exposed to other babies her age, and I am trying not to feel that "Oh My God, your child is walking already??" thing that I was feeling when I saw the other cherubs run around pushing at a large rolling ball while Mattie was content to just sit and hold up two rattles and shake them. She’s finally crawling on her knees (she was commando-crawling for a long time). And I would list all the other ways she is "advanced" (waving! clapping! language! She has a big vocab for an 11 month old!) but I will not. Although I guess I just did. Ha.

It’s hard. How does one raise a child really? And the whole point is the "raising". You can just sit back and let the child do whatever, of course. But being a parent means TEACHING the child things like manners, and why you can’t stick your finger in the electric socket, and how to go to the bathroom. My sister said all the technical things–walking, potty training, etc, are easy compared to the real things–like how do you raise a good and moral person?

My parents were big on parenting. They were the yuppies of their time, with massive parenting books and lots of lectures about life and success and happiness. I’m one of the few people I know whose parents actually sat me down and talked to me about sex. They were excruciatingly embarrassing lectures, but I’m glad my parents were brave enough to teach the birds and the bees.

Other things they taught me…my mom taught me not to be afraid of failure, to always do my best, and even if you don’t reach your goal, at least you tried and you’re farther along than where you started if you’d never even attempted your goal.

My dad taught me three key things: how to play poker, that one should never embezzle money from one’s company (I think I was eleven when Pop taught Wall Street ethics. He was an investment banker and there was a huge banking scandal in Manila at the time. The essence of his lesson: Cheaters Never Win), and how to choose a mate (I’ll share that with you all one day).

Today is the first day the baby’s nanny is going to driver her to her activities so that Mommy can finish writing her books! I just waved them off the driveway. They’ll be fine, I know. It’s just so hard to let go!

In shopping news, hit the Fred Segal sale and scored a fab Mayle fur-trimmed coat for $450 from $900! Perfect for my trips back to the East Coast this winter!